The signs as weird ass dreams I’ve had


Aries: My whole family was being terrorized by giant toys. My sister was kidnapped by a huge wind-up shark

Taurus: I skipped school with a friend to steal Christmas decorations and had tea with a crazy cat lady. I was gone so long that everyone thought I was dead. I also lived next door to President Obama who gave me a big hug when he found out I was safe. When I explained what happened, I started off with “uuuuh let me be clear…” No one finds me funny, even in my dreams.

Cancer: I got grounded because I was swimming in a lake that had a dead body in it that I didn’t know about it. My mom’s reason: “It’s dangerous”

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